Taking Tips from Tyson

Hien: Hi, I'm Hien and I'm kinda new to boxing and I was wondering if I could pick up a few tips from you. Who better to ask then the Iron Mike Tyson right?

Mike: So what? Are you trying to beat me, trying to be bettah than me? Well let me tell you, thith ith the ultimate, thith ith the best b*tch. Ain't nobody bettah than me.

Hien: No sir. I just wanted to take a few tips from you because you are the best. You know I want to be as good as you.

Mike: B*tch you can't be like me. Im the best eva. I'm the most brutal, the most vicious.

Hien: Okay Mike, clearly I can't talk to you like a civilized man. I've asked you very nicely to take me in as an apprentice or even just give me some advice. Well I've got news for you sir, you're not the best. What happened during the Evander Holyfield fight Mike?

Mike: F*ck you, you hoe. Come and say that to my face you b*tch. B*tch! You and him ain't man enough to f*ck with me. Look at you. You scared now. You scared like a little Asian p*ssy. I'll f*ck you till you love me F*ggot.

Random Lady: Hey! Can you stop cursing and screaming please?

Mike: Are you talking out of turn? I don't talk to women unless I fornicate with them. So, you shouldn't talk any more unless... you know.

Hien: That's it Mike, I'm calling Lennox Lewis. He'll teach you some manners.

Mike: Yeah, yeah... Lennox Lewis, Lennox I'm comin' for you.

Hien: You lost to him twice and you're still coming for him? You're crazy Mike. You are crazy.

Mike: My stile is impetuous. My defense is impregnable. I'm ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. I'f I ever thee him again Imma knock him into bulivian.

Hien: Mike... why do you have to be this way? I was showing the most respect. So why did you have to go off on me and that nice little old lady?

Mike: I'm sorry Kien. I'th just I've been through so much you know. Having them take all my money away for tax evathion. Sometimes I wish one of you guys had children so I could kick them in their f*cken head or stomp on their tethicles for you to feel my pain because that's the pain I have waking up every morning.

Hien:...Sorry to bother you Mike.

Audience: This blog was intended for boxing fans ages 16-death.

Purpose: To convey the harsh affects that boxing has on the brain. Clearly all those shots to the head has done Mike Tyson wrong.